I’m a great believer that many people come into our lives and make a huge impression on you. Stefan was just such a person. First impressions were of a mountain of a man, quietly spoken with a superb deep voice rich with his South African roots embedded in it. He was a gentleman, intelligent, polite, a great listener and a kind considerate family man, devoted to dear Frances and sons Jaco & Charl. This extended generously to include Kiree, Jaco’s girlfriend and our own daughter, Katie, Charls girlfriend, and I'm priviledged to say ourselves.

As time rolled on, we all became great friends, My frame of 5ft 9 dwarfed by Stefan’s presence, we must have looked comical deep in conversation over a beer at times. We had great times in Cornwall, Bristol, York and Andover, and it seems impossible that these times are now at an end.

I wanted to mention, fondly, the two sides of Stefan. Stefan as a guest, and Stefan in charge! Firstly Stefan as a guest was amenable, always happy to go with the flow, to a certain point. Rolling schedules were not his cup of tea! He much preferred a plan, a purpose, and most of all TIMINGS. As someone who’s job runs on a timetable, I am happy to let days off roll by. But Stefan was used to  order and purpose. On the occasions we visited a town and shopping was involved, I had a kindred spirit who would wait outside with me whilst others hunted a bargain inside. The prospect of a lunch and few pints would normally appease him.
Now, to Stef in charge. Stefan loved hosting. His day with a BBQ was planned to the final detail. Up early, bread would be prepared, all the ingredients ready for our arrival. The perfect host – drinks would be arranged and dispensed with a relaxed man taking everything in his stride. The fire pit would be roaring and the coal BBQ being warmed up. It was Frances’s dad who fired huge South African steam locomotives during his career, but Stefan would have made a great stoker. I struggle with maintaining coal BBQ’s it’s often a faff with an equal surface temperature, but Stefan had this off to a tee. No such nonsense from the grate when Stef was in charge. Discharging the hosting and dishing out delicious food was when I remember Stefan happiest.

Ironically, whilst on a shopping trip we exchanged thoughts leading up to, agonisingly, his final Christmas with us. He lamented the materialistic side of the festive season. Bemoaning “What the hell do I need with presents”, he continued, “the only gift I want is my family with me, having these guys over is the only present I want. Their time is what is important to me” It was a moving, fitting and perfect way to remember this great man, taken far too soon. We parted with a customary hug and huge smile, his blue eyes twinkling, one of his greatest assets before catching our respective trains home.